About two-year ago, I lost my unborn child. I remember as if it was yesterday, junior year of college, when I found out I was pregnant after visiting Planned Parenthood. I always thought I would fear that moment I found out I was pregnant, but it was nothing like it. Instead I was confused, but at the same time ecstatic at the fact that a little human being was going inside me. Emotions I never thought I would never feel, since I was still in College.
At that time, my boyfriend and I were arguing a lot, so we weren’t able to enjoy the news. Instead we pushed it aside and let our problems and stress take over us. In the midst of all that one night I felt my baby exit my body. A moment that until this day makes me cry uncontrollably. There isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t think of my angel. My baby, was taken from me, and I will never know what my precious son or daughter would have looked like. A choice, God made, one I know I shouldn’t question, but I can’t help to do because it hurts my soul.
Although, my heart aches and I resent my boyfriend and I, I know we couldn’t have changed anything. It wasn’t our time and I now understand that.
–I apologize for the depressing post, but these are my true emotions for today.